I’m going to try to keep this as short as possible. I made a good friend online. A year into talking, we made plans to meet as friends, and I told him I had a crush on him. Suddenly, all he wanted to talk about was s8x. Literally. I was so shocked by his behaviour, I didn’t know how to tell him it made me uncomfortable. And all the crush-like feelings just.. stopped.
He talked a lot about the things he wanted to do to me. But all throughout the time we knew each other, we exchanged pictures once and never video chatted. We simply enjoyed talking to each other. When we met, immediately upon seeing me, he kissed me. No hello, etc. Just kissed me. And I felt that shocked feeling again, had no idea what to do, went along with his actions and we ended up having s8x (which i didn’t enjoy because i was so taken aback by everything, and him being a teenage boy, he had no idea what was going on, so I don’t blame him)
A few weeks in, I got the courage to be honest and tell him what was up. Over the years, we’ve worked through things (and we’ve been living together for many years). We have great s8x, a close friendship, and we’re very much in love. The problem is: I don’t know if I’m actually attracted to him. He is a physically attractive person, otherwise I wouldn’t enjoy the s8x. But he came onto me so strongly, and i didn’t feel the same when it happened. I just kind of grew into it.
My s8xuality has changed since we’ve been together. It’s more about cumming than enjoying being with someone, or being excited about being with someone. I don’t have the excitement of being attracted to the person I’m having s8x with. BUT, i know he’s a physically attractive person. I find myself wondering how things would’ve been had we taken it slow, and at least had a brief conversation before he just kissed me.