11. Guys pay too much attention to your boobs in bed, as if assuming that big boobs automatically equate to “extremely sensitive clitoris-like pleasure appendages.” Not true.

12. You are constantly bothered by dressing advice for “curvy” figures because the advice is always bullshit. Like that thing about belting things at the waist? You look like you’re presenting your boobs on a platter.

13. You can never wear anything backless. You basically cry while watching the Oscars red carpet, jealous of all the side boob you will never flaunt.

14. You can’t wear any bridesmaids dresses because they’re ALWAYS strapless. Damn you brides and your strapless dress leanings. DAMN YOU.

15. You can’t wear blazers. Because they all gape open at the bottom so that your torso looks like a big bell. That cliché work advice about just throwing on a blazer over your dress for your job interview is, to you, fake.

16. You can only wear bib necklaces. Because long ones dangle off the precipice of your boobs like a cat toy.

17. Cross body bags awkwardly snuggle up to your armpit. Like you’re nursing a baby.

18. You look positively beastly if you’re cut off mid-boob in a photo.

19. You feel special kinship with Kate Upton. She can go right on with her busty self.

20. You always wonder what Christina Hendricks has going on underneath her clothes. Because her rack defies all big boob physics, as you — one owner of big boobs — has come to understand them.

21. You are horrified of the idea of being pregnant because even though you love your big boobs, they are big enough.

36 COMMENTS

  1. Hello lady Exposing your breast in Facebook doesn’t make you beautiful or famous. Please kindly delete this pictures, just to respect orders woman like you? Thank you.

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