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Classic Stand up Lines Every Girl Has Heard From a Lagos Boy

Daniel Oyetoro by Daniel Oyetoro
May 8, 2017
Reading Time: 2 mins read
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CLASSIC STAND UP LINES EVERY GIRL HAS HEARD FROM A LAGOS BOY

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If there was ever a universal competition for the smoothest operator and a Lagos boy entered, it is very likely that he would win first place. It may be the confidence in their walk, the wash in their talk, or the dream they sell you and abruptly wake you up from. Here are 4 classic stand up lines you’ve most likely heard. If you haven’t, a word is enough for the wise!

I’m on my way

We are all on our way in Lagos. Being on our way could take anywhere from 30 minutes to 30 days. This especially applies for the Lagos boy. They have mastered the disappearing act, garnering sympathy from you when you most likely need the sympathy, as well as posting you till kingdom come.

There’s Traffic

Traffic is the most accessible excuse to use for just about anything. Traffic could mean the difference between getting somewhere in one hour, to taking 40 days and nights in the wilderness of Lagos traffic to arrive at your destination. Traffic could mean the difference between your date arriving one hour late or your date arriving never.

My mom asked me to do something

What better excuse to avoid hurling insults from a disappointed date than a parent coincidentally asking for a favor on the day where you were supposed to be toasted with a mouth full of free food and an ear full of sweet nothings?

Silence
​
We had to save the worst for last. Silence has got to be the worst stand up line ever. On the day of the date you find your messages aren’t being replied, phone calls aren’t being answered and you’re wondering if they’ve been abducted by ninjas. You realize this is not the case when you see them post on social media.

We love Lagos boys, they are marvelous in our sight! If you’ve fallen prey to being stood up by a Lagos guy, we have good news for you; ALAT won’t stand you up!

Nigeria’s first digital bank ensures you don’t have to deal with traffic, long lines and closing hours as they have a 24-hour hotline that answers emails, phone or social media inquiries as well as a 24- 48 hour free card delivery service. Download DOWNLOAD ALAT from your app store today and get started!

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