It’s more than 20minutes, I’m still unable to put words together to begin this story. I will try keep it simple and necessarily detailed so everyone will understand the true picture of what happened, why against my belief that writing personal experiences on social media is immature, I had to still write mine. Let’s just say I’m not thinking right now, maybe I’m so upset but truth is, I need your advice.

I’m writing this thread seated at the back of a Hilux truck just outside our apartment. Yaa, that me in the picture. You see, today is EID and believe me I should be resting in the house since I’m not working today. Days like this only come by 6times in a whole year and more than anything, I would have loved resting than being out here.

It was yesterday evening, she called and said she her driver were headed to my office. She wanted to pick some stuffs around my office. Yaa, I forgot to say this is Saudi Arabia. If you know Saudi quite well, you will agree with me that a husband will definitely get exhausted running errands for his wife or the family. I was not in the mood for shopping but she wanted to shop. She got upset that I didn’t want to accompany her shopping.

She did her shopping alone and returned few minutes before I closed from work. We headed home. Unknown to me, I forgot my internet router in my office because I was rushing to get home and continue with my FIFA 16.
Her internet service expired some days back so we were using mine.

While playing game, she walked into the seating room and demanded for my router. Mine, not hers. With her tone and facial expression demanding the router, I didn’t respond because there was an indication that she was warming up for a quarrel. I wasn’t just in the mood. The thing is, she is very skilled in extending her anger phases. That is one thing I can’t understand till today. Believe me, it was not like this while we were dating. Sorry, I forgot to tell you I married my university girlfriend, she years my junior and the same department. Ya, I’m one of those guys that dated and planned for the future with their girls at the same time. God blessed that plan but at this point I don’t understand everything that has been happening for the past one year plus since we got married. She repeatedly demanded that I handed over my router to her but I was quiet. Meanwhile, it occurred to me that I forgot the router in my office the minute she first asked about it. Truth is, I actually needed to use the internet that night for my online FIFA.

After several times of asking for the router and no response from me, she took the TV remote and switched off the TV. She walked straight to the kitchen and hid the remote. I approached her in the kitchen and told her I was not ready for any kinda quarrel. We have had enough for the past one year of getting married. I then told her I forgot the router in my office, I didn’t have it. I guess she didn’t believe me, she never did. She told me to leave her alone. I returned back to the seating room with my heart beating fast. I knew she wanted a serious quarrel that night. After some minutes, I returned to the kitchen and requested for the remote. Then I figured out she hid it in her pant. Pretending I was passing by, I swiftly went for the remote from under her short gown and grabbed it. She didn’t expect I knew where she hid it. She followed me behind and ceased the game console, second indication she wanted me to react. I do have a problem with my temper just like every human, male or female. I have also learnt to deal with it by walking away at times I feel I was going to lose it. The same reason I’m outside at this time, 9:55 pm Saudi time. She knows I have fought hard to tame my temper issues but most times, she makes deliberate efforts to have me overreact to her nags and rants.

I watched her hide the console in her pant yet again. I shuddered in obvious fear because I knew what the woman wanted, a fight. Unable to deal with it,the intimidation and the shame, I went for the console and squeezed it out from her hand while she was trying to hold it tight. That was when the trouble then started. She wanted a buffer to help her spill everything she had nursed in her mind. “You are a violent person!! You can kill, idiot!! You were not shown love by your parents, that is why you will squeeze your wife’s hand to collect the console. They allowed you to grow up in the street without parental guidance and love.” Then it came….pwaaaaaaah!!! She spat on my face!!!!! God knows, I have never been spat at before, not by my parents, not by my siblings, not by anybody. ” I agree I was not shown love by my parents but your Dad is a coward for running away from your mother without being there for you guys when he needed to play his roles as a father. That explains the reason you are like this”, I said and walked back to the seating room.

I managed to play a few games which I lost mostly and then slept off around past 5am this morning. Around 3pm, I woke up and went to the office. Not like I had work but I needed to clear my head away from the house. If only there was alcohol in Saudi, I would have been somewhere in a hotel drinking away the shame. When I returned home by past 7pm, hungry and tired. I needed to continue my game but I could no longer find the game console and the TV remote. I asked for it and she ignored me. I managed to eat and then left the house to this truck.

You see, I love my wife more than anything, more than anyone. She is one person in the whole world I could go any length for. I love her, that was why I forgave her when she broke up with me after I left Nigeria for Saudi Arabia. She broke up with me few months after I came to Saudi and started dating another guy twice her age. She says she never expected I would come back to her after she left me but I did. I did because I saw a future with her, a future I imagined, believed in and worked towards its reality. Today we have gotten to a level where most people out there would want to be, our colleagues envy is because they believe we are privileged and blessed but what they don’t know is that in the truth, I have no peace. This marriage has become my legacy and my curse.

I want to send her back to Nigeria in few days time and I hope I’m not making a mistake!!! Spitting on my face, nah nah….am so fed up!!!!

132 COMMENTS

  1. My question to u is, what did u do to her? If u av cheated on her, or do something terrible to her then u deserve it. Cos some men are animals and they deserves to be treated like animals… So search urself bro before u act stupidly.

  2. Y did u give her that chance to spat on u,even if u did something wrong,she has no right to do that.she is not a good wife.but sending her packing is not d best,call her parents and put a notice of warning to all of them,if such reapete u have a right to send her home for her to get proper training bf coming back,if she can learn,than beating her to death.

  3. Thank you for telling us now go back to bed… The tabloids now have your story ,the advise on what next step to take will be given subsequently…just be patient… The public opinion court has come up with an advise… That you should become the wife and let your wife become your husband as we have found out that you lack the capacity mentally and otherwise to be the husband… Hope this advise is taken in goog faith… Big idiot.

  4. Dear poster its either your wife has fallen out of love with you or she is not happy. But one thing is certain the respect is not there. Marriage is for better for worst but it’s not a do or die affair. If you can’t take it anymore then send her back because an abusive partner is never a good thing. For now I’ll advise you both to see a marriage counselor to see if you can mend your marriage at least you will be able to know the reasons behind her strange actions. Just give her another chance i know it’s very disrespectful I know but just try. That marriage counselor or therapy will really help. Trust me. Your wife sef ehn.

  5. No one knows what this man did to the wife to provoke her that much, as we all can see…this is the first time of her spitting on him. Its kinda tells that she doesn’t go to that extreme.

  6. Dear posters some time der are marital issues that are best solve indoor without going to the media. She is your wife , you kw are better than we do . I guess she may not have done that to you before. So y not sit her down see the reason for such actions . Talk sences into her . Make her understand that are are better ways to express ill feeling than violence. I bet you she will come back begging . Make sure at that time you open up your arms to receive her.

  7. This kind of woman that spat on your face, do you think she is still under your control? With the way I see her, you may not be able to do that o’ rather you have to be careful she may be planing to extradite you from there o’ so my advice is , find a way to settle the case amicably with her o’ do not say I did not warn you.

  8. The question is what did you do to her that made her spat on you? I’m sure you have provoked her to the extent of doing that. Why don’t you tell us what you did rather than telling us the action of ur wife.

  9. No matter hw terrible d situatn is in ur marriage no wife shuld do dat to ur own husband n husband shuld nt raise his hand to beat ur wife,nw am nt sayin u shuld pack ur load bt if u knw u cant cope it is advisable to pack ur load instead of sufferin n smiling?,a wife dat can do dat to husband it means dat she can do.dat to her inlaws then,Spat on ur husband for wht?even if its d wife dat is providin.for d family,d bible says wives b submissive to ur own husband n husbands luv ur wives,for no reason.at all shuld a woman.do dat,n To dat man dnt snd her packin yet gv her anoda chance n alwys make her happi,lets learn to.forgv one anoda n lets learn to control our temper,allow God in ur marriage n d lord wl kp ur home ijn

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  11. Pls do many Nigerian men whose families re hungry will accept her, bcos surely she will come with alot of dollars with her, woman don’t just spit ordinary there must be alot pounds and dollars pls do quick many re waiting.

  12. Nothing stopped you from telling her that you forgot the router at work. Remember you had already hurt her by not shopping with her as you guys normally do. Why are you guys always proud? You nags with her. Must you respond back? You said you are the type that do walk away when a nag start. But you will light up the fire before walking away. You guys never had any issues at all. All she is seeking is ATTENTION. Why not try giving her that. Why are you more concentrated on game when you are home with your wife? And she was demanding for an internet to keep her busy too. My dear poster, so many couples had passed through all these stages. Go back to your wife and ask her to forgive you. When she does, now made her understand that spat on your face is the worst she can do to hurt you. Believe me, she will break down and will never do it again. She’s only a woman. Always handle her with carefulness. I am against her spitting on you. But do forgive her and manage your marriage.

  13. We shld learn 2 control our emotions in any situation. People do over react in anger, and later regret deir manner less respond afterward. At poster, u even tried 4 not av beaten hell out of her 4 dat silly act of hers.From what av read it shows dat ur ar a cool headed man. Pls, don’t do dat yet. Dere ar many ways 2 deal wt a naughty woman dat can tame her,At present, just be urself,don’t eat her food, don’t sleep wt her etc. Just do dat 4 a while nd study her reaction. Gud luck

  14. Why I hate to comment on posts like this…
    1..men I’ll side the man
    2 women I’ll pour their mind
    3 nobody I’ll ask what lead to the woman losing her cool..
    4..usless people I’ll say she doesn’t love and respect the man..
    5..people I’ll condemn her meanwhile their own wife’s or husband had done worst tins and they can’t talk
    6…you all should understand that before a woman starts hating she must have been pushed to wall…
    7..if u can’t take it leave it..
    8…this the worst place to seek advise.. Sort it issues itself.. Cos no one cares..
    9…you both should talk abt it and know her reason.. You mind give Her reasons never to do dat again..
    10…am out of here…..

  15. Bros just patiently wait until there’s an occasion that warrants all of you coming back, eg burial or marriage. Bring her back and seize her passport. Case closed. Let her enjoy with her village people.

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